THE PARISH OF OUR LADY & ST BENEDICT
  • Home
    • Church History
  • Mass Times
    • Church opening times
  • Newsletters
    • Trinity Sunday
    • Pentecost Sunday
    • Seventh Sunday of Easter
    • Sixth Sunday of Easter
    • Fifth Sunday of Easter
    • Fourth Sunday of Easter
    • Third Sunday of Easter
    • Second Sunday of Easter
    • Easter Sunday 2025
    • Palm Sunday
    • Fifth Sunday of Lent
    • Fourth Sunday of Lent
    • Third Sunday of Lent
    • Second Sunday of Lent
    • First Sunday in Lent
    • Eighth Sunday
    • Seventh Sunday of the Year
    • Sixth Sunday of the Year
    • Fifth Sunday of the Year
    • The Presentation of the Lord
    • Third Sunday of the Year
    • Second Sunday of the Year
    • The Baptism of the Lord
    • The Epiphany of the Lord
    • Feast of the Holy Family
    • Fourth Sunday of Advent & Christmas
    • Third Sunday of Advent
    • 2nd Sunday of Advent
    • First Sunday of Advent
    • Our Lord Jesus Christ, King of the Universe
    • Thirty-third Sunday
    • Thirty second Sunday
    • Thirty-first Sunday
    • Thirtieth Sunday
    • Twenty-ninth Sunday
    • Twenty-eighth Sunday
    • Twenty-seventh Sunday
    • Twenty-sixth Sunday
    • Twenty-fifth Sunday
    • Twenty-fourth Sunday
    • Twenty-third Sunday
    • Twenty-second Sunday
    • Twenty-first Sunday
    • Twentieth Sunday
    • Nineteenth Sunday
    • Eighteenth Sunday
    • Seventeenth Sunday
    • Sixteenth Sunday
    • Fifteenth Sunday
    • Fourteenth Sunday
    • St Peter & St Paul
    • Twelfth Sunday
    • Eleventh Sunday of Year
    • Tenth Sunday of the Year
    • Corpus Christi First Communion Sunday
    • Low Sunday/Divine Mercy Sunday
    • First Sunday of Lent
    • Fourth Sunday of the Year
    • Thirteenth Sunday
    • The Most Holy Body & Blood of Christ
    • Christmas Day
    • Mary, Mother
    • World Mission Sunday
    • The Assumption of Our Lady
    • Eighteenth Sunday
  • Outreach
    • Ukrainian Help & Support >
      • Ukrainian Support Group
    • Justice & Peace
    • Lend With Care
    • Middlesbrough Food Bank >
      • Middlesbrough Foodbank Archive
    • The Sick and the Unwell
    • The Society of St Vincent de Paul (SVP)
    • Zimbabwe missions appeal >
      • Monastery of Christ the Word, Zimbabwe
      • Mary Sturges history with Zimbabwe
      • Zimbabwe thank you notes
      • Mashambanzou Bulletin September 2020
    • Historic Outreach >
      • Climate Change Zoom event 24/04/21
      • ​Together Middlesbrough and Cleveland (TMC)
      • Fundraising event for Mary’s Meals 03/10/2021
  • Fees & Donations
    • Easyfundraiser
    • Parish Hall Hire
  • Forms
    • Legacy
  • Contact us
  • Gallery
    • Parish BBQ 2022
    • Parish BBQ 2021
    • Bernard's bench 2020
    • Cherry tree in blossom 2020
    • Church 2016
    • Rievaulx Pilgrimage 2014
    • Photos from early 1900's
  • Coronavirus
    • Caritas Middlesbrough helpline
    • Live streaming
  • Cemetery Protocols
  • GDPR - Privacy Notice
  • Safeguarding
  • Useful Links
  • Archive
    • 100 Club Winners
    • Caristas Newsletter
    • Homilies >
      • Twenty-third Sunday
      • Twenty-second Sunday
      • Thirty-first Sunday
      • The Assumption of the Blessed Virgin Mary
      • Nineteenth Sunday
      • Eighteenth Sunday
      • Seventeenth Sunday
      • Sixteenth Sunday
      • Fifteenth Sunday Yr B
      • Fourteenth Sunday
      • St Peter & St Paul
      • Thirteenth Sunday
      • Twelfth Sunday
      • Eleventh Sunday of Ordinary Time
      • The Most Holy Trinity
      • Pentecost Sunday
      • Seventh Sunday of Easter
      • The Ascension of the Lord
      • Sixth Sunday of Easter
      • Fifth Sunday of Easter
      • Fourth Sunday of Easter
      • Third Sunday of Easter
      • Second Sunday of Easter
      • Homily; Maundy Thursday 2021
      • Homily; Good Friday 2021
      • Homily; Easter Vigil & Easter Day 2021
      • Palm Sunday
      • Fifth Sunday of Lent
      • Fourth Sunday of Lent
      • Third Sunday of Lent
      • Second Sunday of Lent
      • First Sunday of Lent
      • Ash Wednesday
      • Sixth Sunday of Ordinary Time
      • Fifth Sunday of Ordinary Time
      • Fourth Sunday in Ordinary Time
      • Third Sunday of Ordinary Time
      • Second Sunday of Ordinary Time
      • Baptism of Our Lord
      • Epiphany of the Lord
      • Homily; 1 Jan 2021; Mary Mother of God
      • Christmas Midnight Mass
      • Fourth Sunday of Advent
      • Third Sunday of Advent
      • Homily 2nd Sunday of Advent
      • Homily; 1st Sunday of Advent
      • Thirty-third Sunday
      • Thirty-second Sunday
      • All Souls
      • All Saints
      • Thirtieth Sunday
      • Twenty-ninth Sunday
      • Twenty-eighth Sunday
      • Twenty seventh Sunday
      • Twenty-sixth Sunday
      • Twenty-fifth Sunday
      • Twenty Fourth Sunday
      • Nineteenth Sunday
      • Seventeenth Sunday
      • Trinity Sunday
      • Homily for Tuesday Wk 6 Easter
      • Seventh Sunday of Ordinary Time
      • The Presentation of the Lord
      • Third Sunday of Ordinary Time
      • Holy Family
      • Mary Mother of God
      • Second Sunday of Advent
      • First Sunday of Advent
      • Remembrance Sunday
      • Our Lord Jesus Christ, King of the Universe
      • Twenty-fourth Sunday
      • Twentieth Sunday
      • Eighteenth Sunday
      • Sixteenth Sunday
      • The Most Holy Body & Blood of Christ
      • Seventh Sunday of Easter
      • Eighth Sunday of Ordinary Time
      • Fourth Sunday of Ordinary Time
      • Thirteenth Sunday
      • St John the Baptist
      • Tenth Sunday of Ordinary Time
      • Transfiguration of the Lord
      • Cemetery Mass
    • Knitting for Refugees
    • Rosa Ampleforth
“..Resentment & anger, these are foul things..” ..Some years ago leading retreat for teachers from Catholic High School..it emerged that thorn in their flesh was group of protesting parents, who found fault after fault with the School & particularly with the teachers; exhausting hateful & disheartening.. I listened as much of wound opened & the poison came out, & in end, I asked them to be patient to keep together in support of one another, & assured them that their moment would come for them to put into practice one of most underused & underestimated beatitudes of our Catholicism..their moment would come for..revenge.. 5 sec delay, then they burst into laughter of relief & release..& still with a smile, they remind me..

“..Resentment & anger, these are foul things..” ..picking at the scab..            ; Lord have mercy“
“…He who exacts vengeance will experience the vengeance of the Lord.. ; Christ have mercy
“..Forgive your neighbor the hurt he does you..”                                                ; Lord have mercy
May Almighty God have mercy on us, forgive us our sins & bring us to everlasting life. Amen

How often must I forgive?” You know well enough the answer, & you know well enough by now my zero tolerance towards St Matthew & his gospel, written by a Jew for Jews..insider dealing, full of stick & carrot religious practice still taught & swallowed by generations of us; taught indoctrinated by religious sisters who put the fear of God into us; bless them, a fear, a terror of a God of zero tolerance they’d be raised to believe in & obey in childhood in Ireland then in their convents in England; you meet them 50yrs later in their convent care homes & they’ve been transformed redeemed..they’ve read & been introduced to Luke’s gospel of compassion & self-forgiveness, an intimate relationship heart to heart, an incarnation after 65yrs of barrenness in religious life..if you asked Luke’s Jesus same question “how often must I forgive?” instead of Matthew’s maths test & magic number 77..not 73 or 79 but 77..Luke’s Jesus would probably say & with a beamer of a smile to die for..”as many times as necessary, & enjoy every one of them; the two of you & me together again” feel the difference even from behind your face mask, shielding us from a smile of reconciliation & divine self-acceptance..”come as you are, that’s how I love you.” Words of a cheesy hymn “no need to fear, love sets no limits; no need to fear, love never ends; don’t run away, shamed & disheartened, rest in my love, trust me again.”Such a contrast to a gospel of revenge “were you not bound to have pity?” can pity be ladled out on demand & under instruction?..judged/bound handed over to the torturers & it gets worse “this is how my heavenly Father will deal with you, unless you forgive your brother from your heart.” chilling frightening theology..to be dealt with..like a tax return..This gospel always brings to mind & heart story of Rev Julie Nicholson..C of E vicar in Bristol who lost one of her daughters, Jenny, in 7 July 2005 bombings in London..if I could share desert island with one other person for 6 months of a lockdown it would be with her. Shared with you before her visit to London for the memorial service in Trafalgar Square, & of her going en route into St Pauls Cathedral & bizarrely to her at time, asking to see duty Vicar..frail elderly spent clergyman..she told some of it to him..he placed one hand into hers, the other into hand of Jennys fiance & said “I haven’t got many years left now but I promise you every day from now on, I will offer a prayer for both of you & for Jenny each day”..of the taxi driver, who’d grumpily refused to let her in at end of his shift, & spark in his eye was caught by hers & he said “get in” trying to get her across London to Paddington Stn in rush hour, listening to her tragic story, & when he got her there, told her to stay in & drove her all way to her sisters in Reading “how much do I owe you?” she asked gratefully gracefully..he replied “nothing, I just want you to know there are still good people who care for others in need like you”..after Jenny’s funeral & some time off she returned to her Parish in Bristol..each morning she celebrated Mass & each morning it began as we do, asking for forgiveness, her & her flocks ground zero before launching into baking bread & making the Body of Christ fully present in word & sacrament..& each morning she faltered at words of reconciliation..until one morning she gave up..stood down as Parish priest because she felt hypocritical, asking & praying for forgiveness when she couldn’t forgive Mohammed Sidique Khan..a terrorist from Leeds; born there 1974, a student at Leeds Becket University round corner from my sisters..an hour from here..she said at the time “I can’t forgive Sidique”..& then added, which is the saving grace for me in my struggle to forgive the unforgivable in my life “I can’t forgive Sidique..for the time being” wonderfully real compassionate & honest theology. Not “never” but, with the healing of time & the ingress of divine grace, then perhaps one day.. what courage to take off the mask of hypocrisy, to “come out” as world likes to term it in certain relationships we [ we ] label awkward, & to wait patiently expectantly for the sacred moment when forgiveness will emerge..”Lord remember me when you come into your kingdom”..as good thief, you & me struggle on our cross alongside Christ on His Cross on which He finally was able to speak your truth” Father, forgive them for they know not what they do”..today you will be with me in paradise” Julie Sidique Jenny & Our Lord..Julie has said in recent years as her struggle continues “forgiveness is too easy language, it is too complex, & it’s not about forgiveness. I struggle with a lot of the Bible but I really like Job, me too, which seems to get to the heart of suffering & raging. I also love the temptation of Eve; I find her curiosity & quest for knowledge terribly liberating. I really dislike the passage about being a good wife.” Bless her..I can’t forgive my Sidique in my community..until I take a pause moment & a deep intake of breath..the breath of the Holy Spirit, which empowers inspires me to say & to believe “for the time being”..”the life & death of each of us has its influence on others”..a terrorist Yorkshireman from my own home city, Jenny & Julie, the good thief, Jesus Christ, & you & I..”the life & death of each of us has its influence on others”..remember like Julie, the pause moment & the deep intake of breath..”give me time & I will pay you” & what a gift it will be for the Good Lord when she, in His good time & hers, walks back onto the sanctuary & celebrates Mass again..or will it be for the first time?..& if it was to be here at this altar, would you come?..would you be tempted like Eve to come with curiosity & find yourself..find yourself..& be liberated?..or is self-isolation safer justifiable & excusable?..shielding behind a face mask from the virus or from facing the truth?.. [24thSunYrA Mt 18;21-35] 
Website by Gabriel Media Limited
  • Home
    • Church History
  • Mass Times
    • Church opening times
  • Newsletters
    • Trinity Sunday
    • Pentecost Sunday
    • Seventh Sunday of Easter
    • Sixth Sunday of Easter
    • Fifth Sunday of Easter
    • Fourth Sunday of Easter
    • Third Sunday of Easter
    • Second Sunday of Easter
    • Easter Sunday 2025
    • Palm Sunday
    • Fifth Sunday of Lent
    • Fourth Sunday of Lent
    • Third Sunday of Lent
    • Second Sunday of Lent
    • First Sunday in Lent
    • Eighth Sunday
    • Seventh Sunday of the Year
    • Sixth Sunday of the Year
    • Fifth Sunday of the Year
    • The Presentation of the Lord
    • Third Sunday of the Year
    • Second Sunday of the Year
    • The Baptism of the Lord
    • The Epiphany of the Lord
    • Feast of the Holy Family
    • Fourth Sunday of Advent & Christmas
    • Third Sunday of Advent
    • 2nd Sunday of Advent
    • First Sunday of Advent
    • Our Lord Jesus Christ, King of the Universe
    • Thirty-third Sunday
    • Thirty second Sunday
    • Thirty-first Sunday
    • Thirtieth Sunday
    • Twenty-ninth Sunday
    • Twenty-eighth Sunday
    • Twenty-seventh Sunday
    • Twenty-sixth Sunday
    • Twenty-fifth Sunday
    • Twenty-fourth Sunday
    • Twenty-third Sunday
    • Twenty-second Sunday
    • Twenty-first Sunday
    • Twentieth Sunday
    • Nineteenth Sunday
    • Eighteenth Sunday
    • Seventeenth Sunday
    • Sixteenth Sunday
    • Fifteenth Sunday
    • Fourteenth Sunday
    • St Peter & St Paul
    • Twelfth Sunday
    • Eleventh Sunday of Year
    • Tenth Sunday of the Year
    • Corpus Christi First Communion Sunday
    • Low Sunday/Divine Mercy Sunday
    • First Sunday of Lent
    • Fourth Sunday of the Year
    • Thirteenth Sunday
    • The Most Holy Body & Blood of Christ
    • Christmas Day
    • Mary, Mother
    • World Mission Sunday
    • The Assumption of Our Lady
    • Eighteenth Sunday
  • Outreach
    • Ukrainian Help & Support >
      • Ukrainian Support Group
    • Justice & Peace
    • Lend With Care
    • Middlesbrough Food Bank >
      • Middlesbrough Foodbank Archive
    • The Sick and the Unwell
    • The Society of St Vincent de Paul (SVP)
    • Zimbabwe missions appeal >
      • Monastery of Christ the Word, Zimbabwe
      • Mary Sturges history with Zimbabwe
      • Zimbabwe thank you notes
      • Mashambanzou Bulletin September 2020
    • Historic Outreach >
      • Climate Change Zoom event 24/04/21
      • ​Together Middlesbrough and Cleveland (TMC)
      • Fundraising event for Mary’s Meals 03/10/2021
  • Fees & Donations
    • Easyfundraiser
    • Parish Hall Hire
  • Forms
    • Legacy
  • Contact us
  • Gallery
    • Parish BBQ 2022
    • Parish BBQ 2021
    • Bernard's bench 2020
    • Cherry tree in blossom 2020
    • Church 2016
    • Rievaulx Pilgrimage 2014
    • Photos from early 1900's
  • Coronavirus
    • Caritas Middlesbrough helpline
    • Live streaming
  • Cemetery Protocols
  • GDPR - Privacy Notice
  • Safeguarding
  • Useful Links
  • Archive
    • 100 Club Winners
    • Caristas Newsletter
    • Homilies >
      • Twenty-third Sunday
      • Twenty-second Sunday
      • Thirty-first Sunday
      • The Assumption of the Blessed Virgin Mary
      • Nineteenth Sunday
      • Eighteenth Sunday
      • Seventeenth Sunday
      • Sixteenth Sunday
      • Fifteenth Sunday Yr B
      • Fourteenth Sunday
      • St Peter & St Paul
      • Thirteenth Sunday
      • Twelfth Sunday
      • Eleventh Sunday of Ordinary Time
      • The Most Holy Trinity
      • Pentecost Sunday
      • Seventh Sunday of Easter
      • The Ascension of the Lord
      • Sixth Sunday of Easter
      • Fifth Sunday of Easter
      • Fourth Sunday of Easter
      • Third Sunday of Easter
      • Second Sunday of Easter
      • Homily; Maundy Thursday 2021
      • Homily; Good Friday 2021
      • Homily; Easter Vigil & Easter Day 2021
      • Palm Sunday
      • Fifth Sunday of Lent
      • Fourth Sunday of Lent
      • Third Sunday of Lent
      • Second Sunday of Lent
      • First Sunday of Lent
      • Ash Wednesday
      • Sixth Sunday of Ordinary Time
      • Fifth Sunday of Ordinary Time
      • Fourth Sunday in Ordinary Time
      • Third Sunday of Ordinary Time
      • Second Sunday of Ordinary Time
      • Baptism of Our Lord
      • Epiphany of the Lord
      • Homily; 1 Jan 2021; Mary Mother of God
      • Christmas Midnight Mass
      • Fourth Sunday of Advent
      • Third Sunday of Advent
      • Homily 2nd Sunday of Advent
      • Homily; 1st Sunday of Advent
      • Thirty-third Sunday
      • Thirty-second Sunday
      • All Souls
      • All Saints
      • Thirtieth Sunday
      • Twenty-ninth Sunday
      • Twenty-eighth Sunday
      • Twenty seventh Sunday
      • Twenty-sixth Sunday
      • Twenty-fifth Sunday
      • Twenty Fourth Sunday
      • Nineteenth Sunday
      • Seventeenth Sunday
      • Trinity Sunday
      • Homily for Tuesday Wk 6 Easter
      • Seventh Sunday of Ordinary Time
      • The Presentation of the Lord
      • Third Sunday of Ordinary Time
      • Holy Family
      • Mary Mother of God
      • Second Sunday of Advent
      • First Sunday of Advent
      • Remembrance Sunday
      • Our Lord Jesus Christ, King of the Universe
      • Twenty-fourth Sunday
      • Twentieth Sunday
      • Eighteenth Sunday
      • Sixteenth Sunday
      • The Most Holy Body & Blood of Christ
      • Seventh Sunday of Easter
      • Eighth Sunday of Ordinary Time
      • Fourth Sunday of Ordinary Time
      • Thirteenth Sunday
      • St John the Baptist
      • Tenth Sunday of Ordinary Time
      • Transfiguration of the Lord
      • Cemetery Mass
    • Knitting for Refugees
    • Rosa Ampleforth